Warm wind through the trees, it ripples the leaves
the sky up above, rich in blue.
While white clouds caress the bottomless sky
some bright rays of sun shine right throughI drink in the beauty, my heart is like ice
I’m frozen inside, looking out
I’m numb with the pain, lived over again
I’m certain I’ll never thaw outMy legs are mechanical, go through the moves
my focus is blurry and grim.
I’m missing a main piece of jigsaw, it’s gone
and no other piece will fit in.My memory goes wandering, out of control.
I think of the loss that is mine.
Cause ‘never again’ is hard to believe.
I’m searching around for a ‘sign’.A shadow is trailing me, holding me down;
its talons have shut out the hope.
This cavern of loss will swallow me up.
I’m feeling unable to cope.The days into months through the seasons;
I stumble my way down life’s path.
But small glints of light, they loosen the ice.
I’m slowly relearning to laugh.I’m almost myself, it’s taken so long;
a part of me died with my dad.
Acceptance is tough, truth heightens the pain
as memories are all that I have.
© Nicky Clifford 2016