Newborn Hell

Postnatal Depression is a CURSEnewborn Web Nature’s kiss –

my newborn’s aura shines bright,

as tears of awe

flow silently

into pools of wonder.

All I had ever wanted

                                            and more.Eye WebYet it changed.

Oh. How. It. Changed.

Endless, screaming nights

where hell becomes reality,

where nothing will comfort or soothe,

where nightmares haunt my waking hours.

Where fear grapples me to the ground

over and over and over.Eye WebMy heart ripped cruelly to shreds.

Expectations tossed carelessly aside.Eye WebAs day upon day I trudge

through nappies and feeding and nappies

until I am

sucked down

into

desperate

depths.

Can’t see a way up from here.Eye WebNo escape.

No light.

No hope.Eye WebA baby craving nurture.

A mother knocking to be free.

What now?

© Nicky Clifford 2016

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